Jacko Wacko, Krusty Rusty

Apparently Jay Leno wants his gag order on the Michael Jackson trial clarified to allow him to keep using Jackson "jokes" in his monologue. Leno is expected to testify as a witness for the defense and he has been barred from publicly speaking about any evidence to which he may be privy. Via an anonymous source, Devious Nature has exclusively obtained a copy of a letter, attached to his motion for clarification, written on Tonight Show stationery and signed by Jay Leno, although presumably penned by one of his writers:

Your Honor,

"Michael Jackson humor is my bread and butter. I've been telling jokes about him for twenty years, and I urge you to allow me to continue. Without Jacko, I'd have to fall back on O.J. jokes and Lorena Bobbett gags. Are you prepared to have that on your conscience? Why would you want to separate an artist from his canvas? Would you take away Harpo's horn? Would you send Chaplin out without his cane? Would you steal Carrot-Top's whatever-he's-attached-to-a-toilet-seat-this-week?

Carrot-Top is a national treasure.

Lets face it, Your Honor, I'm a bit of a one-trick pony, and if you're going to break my leg, you may just as well take me out back, shoot me, and send my ugly carcass to the glue factory. Am I right Kevin? The glue factory. Like what they'd do to a pony. . .you know, a pony with a broken leg. . .Hey everybody, Kevin smokes pot."
. . .

Leno's letter continues, making light of Paris Hilton's promiscuity for a full nine pages and then finally grinding to a blessed end.