Editor-in-Chief
Dear Newsweek,
Shame on you for accepting responsibility for your alleged 'inaccuracies,' consistent with your J-School media ethics coursework (Yeah, I've been there). Surely you know that whatever pressure you succumb to would only encourage Them. Now the White House is calling for more, and while every fiber of my being says that, yes, the media should be held accountable for its own errors - if you give these feds an acre, they'll happily harvest the whole damn plot. Surely you must know that by now. They're saying that YOU have tarnished the good name of the United States. There surely can't be a man, woman or child in this nation who doesn't see the fallacy in that statement, but they're getting away with it. They won't stop until every Newsweek employee is wandering the streets of Kabul handing out "USA: A-O.K." buttons and every time you want to so much as publish a page 37 "Britney Spears Pregnancy Watch" blurb in that magazine of yours, it will have to pass muster with the thought police. And if you don't think it will spread to every other magazine, newspaper, television affiliate, blog, brochure, flyer, poster and cocktail-napkin-scribble, you've been smoking too much of that Afghani opium our military actions have made so readily available.
I beseech you, retract the retraction, before it's too late. Do you think "Libel" is a term to keep a reporter up at night? Consider the words "Prior Restraint" and you just TRY to make it 'til morning without wetting the bed.
Yours in poorly-concealed liberalism,
Alex Brukowski
P.S:Please stop sending re-subscription invitations. It's been four years. It's over. I've moved on. I'm sorry. There's someone out there for you, I just know it. Things seem tough right now, but with your personality, I'm sure you’ll make someone very happy.
Shame on you for accepting responsibility for your alleged 'inaccuracies,' consistent with your J-School media ethics coursework (Yeah, I've been there). Surely you know that whatever pressure you succumb to would only encourage Them. Now the White House is calling for more, and while every fiber of my being says that, yes, the media should be held accountable for its own errors - if you give these feds an acre, they'll happily harvest the whole damn plot. Surely you must know that by now. They're saying that YOU have tarnished the good name of the United States. There surely can't be a man, woman or child in this nation who doesn't see the fallacy in that statement, but they're getting away with it. They won't stop until every Newsweek employee is wandering the streets of Kabul handing out "USA: A-O.K." buttons and every time you want to so much as publish a page 37 "Britney Spears Pregnancy Watch" blurb in that magazine of yours, it will have to pass muster with the thought police. And if you don't think it will spread to every other magazine, newspaper, television affiliate, blog, brochure, flyer, poster and cocktail-napkin-scribble, you've been smoking too much of that Afghani opium our military actions have made so readily available.
I beseech you, retract the retraction, before it's too late. Do you think "Libel" is a term to keep a reporter up at night? Consider the words "Prior Restraint" and you just TRY to make it 'til morning without wetting the bed.
Yours in poorly-concealed liberalism,
Alex Brukowski
P.S:Please stop sending re-subscription invitations. It's been four years. It's over. I've moved on. I'm sorry. There's someone out there for you, I just know it. Things seem tough right now, but with your personality, I'm sure you’ll make someone very happy.
posted by ab at 5/18/2005
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