Lights On
Governor Pawlenty, I am a concerned citizen. I worry that a budget deal won't be agreed by the end of the month, causing a state government shutdown and a loss of work for 16,000 employees. I know you didn't listen to my idea for privatizing the roads, and that's OK, even though that kind of revenue could have solved this budget problem weeks ago. I just thought you were the sort of man to take that kind of risk, but I guess I was wrong. That was more my fault than it was yours, though, so please don't beat yourself up about it.
I don't blame you one bit for the state our mess is in. In fact, I commend you on your efforts to try so hard to break the stalemate, in blatant disregard to the views of your conservative taskmasters and putting at serious risk your delusional aspirations for Republican presidential candidacy. You don't care if, by going back on your no-new-taxes pledge, you'll lose any slim chance of attaining the White House. Oh no, not you. You certainly aren't the type to use the state's highest office as mere resume' padding, and we all appreciate that immeasurably.
So, having been inspired by your shining example of selfless philanthropy, I too would like to do my part to aid this beloved state of Minnesota. That's right, Governor, I would like to give back the State Income Tax Refund check I received this year. I want you to keep that money. You need it more than I do, surely. I had planned to spend it at the racino, but, well. . . you know. So what am I going to do with it now? Nothing, that's what. It's just going to go to waste. But you, you can put it to good use, Tim. You, the idyllic picture of gubernatorial excellence. I don't even care how you spend it - All on one program or split all over the state. There's plenty to go around. Maybe give a bit to the parks, a portion for the roads, some for the Department of Motor Vehicles. Heck, you can even take a little for yourself, I don't mind. You deserve it, Timbo.
I apologize for being so long-winded about this. I expect you'll want to call a press conference right away to tell the ladies and gentlemen of the media that our problems are solved. Maybe we can have it reissued into one of those giant-sized novelty checks and I can hand it over to you in a special ceremony, wouldn't that be fantastic? Have your people call my people. Let's do this. Together, we can make a better Minnesota.
AB
P.S: Under no circumstances is my money to go toward the funding of a Vikings stadium. Cheers.
I don't blame you one bit for the state our mess is in. In fact, I commend you on your efforts to try so hard to break the stalemate, in blatant disregard to the views of your conservative taskmasters and putting at serious risk your delusional aspirations for Republican presidential candidacy. You don't care if, by going back on your no-new-taxes pledge, you'll lose any slim chance of attaining the White House. Oh no, not you. You certainly aren't the type to use the state's highest office as mere resume' padding, and we all appreciate that immeasurably.
So, having been inspired by your shining example of selfless philanthropy, I too would like to do my part to aid this beloved state of Minnesota. That's right, Governor, I would like to give back the State Income Tax Refund check I received this year. I want you to keep that money. You need it more than I do, surely. I had planned to spend it at the racino, but, well. . . you know. So what am I going to do with it now? Nothing, that's what. It's just going to go to waste. But you, you can put it to good use, Tim. You, the idyllic picture of gubernatorial excellence. I don't even care how you spend it - All on one program or split all over the state. There's plenty to go around. Maybe give a bit to the parks, a portion for the roads, some for the Department of Motor Vehicles. Heck, you can even take a little for yourself, I don't mind. You deserve it, Timbo.
I apologize for being so long-winded about this. I expect you'll want to call a press conference right away to tell the ladies and gentlemen of the media that our problems are solved. Maybe we can have it reissued into one of those giant-sized novelty checks and I can hand it over to you in a special ceremony, wouldn't that be fantastic? Have your people call my people. Let's do this. Together, we can make a better Minnesota.
AB
P.S: Under no circumstances is my money to go toward the funding of a Vikings stadium. Cheers.
posted by ab at 6/17/2005
1 Comments:
does pawlenty read your blog?
tell him thanks for closing target market for me!
dr. venkmann
jeb bush- rocking the '08 ballot
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