NOW How Much Would You Pay?
You asked for it.
Gas prices are, of course, hitting an all-time high, and are expected to rise progressively higher as the early summer travel season gets into full-swing. You all know this.
So? Deal with it, chumps.
This country has consumed a thousand times its fair share of oil in the last century. SUVs, one-ton pickups, Hummers, for chrissake! Think about this concept, if for the first time, really, think about it; MOBILE HOMES. Jesus! Its about time we start paying our way. Its the only way we'll learn that we're going to run out of the stuff someday. Someday SOON.
But after all, what's more patriotic than monitoring your gas usage? During World War II, the U.S. government imposed a "victory speed" on all the nation's highways, in order to conserve tire rubber and gasoline. They asked that motorists keep their speed under 35 mph at all times. Ah, but times have changed, my friends! This war is a war ABOUT oil. Hmm... actually, now that I think about it, we can't support our government by NOT using oil - what kind of message is that sending our leaders? I mean, what if, hypothetically, when you were a child, your father occasionally went 50 miles out of his way (never mind the gas used...) to visit the best damn seafood seller in the county, so that he could bring home lobster for the family dinner? Would you not enjoy it all the more knowing how much effort he put in? Out of respect for dear old dad, you'd eat and eat and ask for more - look how much our father loves us! And what if instead of dad making the trip, he sent a couple of your brothers and perhaps a sister to pick up that delectable ocean treat? You'd thank dad for sending them, sure, but of course you'd take the time to thank them as well, right? But what if one of your siblings died on the journey? What would you do then? That's right, you eat every scrap of seafood the survivors could bring! What a sacrifice! "Gee whiz, pops, this is the best darn crustacean I ever did taste! Sure was worth any cost!"
So why, oh why, I ask you, are we buying up ethanol-compatable trucks and tiny hybrids? Support Our Leader's unselfish efforts to sacrifice our brothers and sisters by consuming even more gas! Victory Speed? How about 85 mph MINIMUM? If we don't use that oil, somebody else will anyway! " Why, yes, Mr. President," we'll say, "sure it was the right choice! I certainly can't cope with the guilt of knowing the man who runs my country would willingly sacrifice my fellow citizens in order to preserve his obligations to his wealthy petroleum-stock-holding campaign contributors! Think of the sleep I'd lose if I thought about THAT too much! My oh my, no; much better to smile through it all and assume that those in change surely must know what they're doing. Ohh, the bliss of ignorance..."
Ok, enough. The bottom line is: We're pissing away the world's finite resources at a whim. OIL IS THE MOST VALUABLE SUBSTANCE ON EARTH. Its obviously worth more than human life, any media consumer is reminded of that on a daily basis. Four dollars for a gallon? What's the going rate on a pound of flesh?
Gas prices are, of course, hitting an all-time high, and are expected to rise progressively higher as the early summer travel season gets into full-swing. You all know this.
So? Deal with it, chumps.
This country has consumed a thousand times its fair share of oil in the last century. SUVs, one-ton pickups, Hummers, for chrissake! Think about this concept, if for the first time, really, think about it; MOBILE HOMES. Jesus! Its about time we start paying our way. Its the only way we'll learn that we're going to run out of the stuff someday. Someday SOON.
But after all, what's more patriotic than monitoring your gas usage? During World War II, the U.S. government imposed a "victory speed" on all the nation's highways, in order to conserve tire rubber and gasoline. They asked that motorists keep their speed under 35 mph at all times. Ah, but times have changed, my friends! This war is a war ABOUT oil. Hmm... actually, now that I think about it, we can't support our government by NOT using oil - what kind of message is that sending our leaders? I mean, what if, hypothetically, when you were a child, your father occasionally went 50 miles out of his way (never mind the gas used...) to visit the best damn seafood seller in the county, so that he could bring home lobster for the family dinner? Would you not enjoy it all the more knowing how much effort he put in? Out of respect for dear old dad, you'd eat and eat and ask for more - look how much our father loves us! And what if instead of dad making the trip, he sent a couple of your brothers and perhaps a sister to pick up that delectable ocean treat? You'd thank dad for sending them, sure, but of course you'd take the time to thank them as well, right? But what if one of your siblings died on the journey? What would you do then? That's right, you eat every scrap of seafood the survivors could bring! What a sacrifice! "Gee whiz, pops, this is the best darn crustacean I ever did taste! Sure was worth any cost!"
So why, oh why, I ask you, are we buying up ethanol-compatable trucks and tiny hybrids? Support Our Leader's unselfish efforts to sacrifice our brothers and sisters by consuming even more gas! Victory Speed? How about 85 mph MINIMUM? If we don't use that oil, somebody else will anyway! " Why, yes, Mr. President," we'll say, "sure it was the right choice! I certainly can't cope with the guilt of knowing the man who runs my country would willingly sacrifice my fellow citizens in order to preserve his obligations to his wealthy petroleum-stock-holding campaign contributors! Think of the sleep I'd lose if I thought about THAT too much! My oh my, no; much better to smile through it all and assume that those in change surely must know what they're doing. Ohh, the bliss of ignorance..."
Ok, enough. The bottom line is: We're pissing away the world's finite resources at a whim. OIL IS THE MOST VALUABLE SUBSTANCE ON EARTH. Its obviously worth more than human life, any media consumer is reminded of that on a daily basis. Four dollars for a gallon? What's the going rate on a pound of flesh?
posted by ab at 4/30/2006
2 Comments:
I dont know the average weight of a solder these days, but the benefits are pretty darned good now, $400,000. http://www.goarmy.com/reserve/nps/health_care.jsp
We use to only get $100,000, so a pound of flesh is worth more these days I guess too. Of course WE wouldnt get the money, instead our loved ones would "have 100,000 reasons to love us" or so we joked... A soldiers humor is so grim and to the point.
...and by the way, these electronic lines are monitored by the NSA, courtesy of AT&T. Be careful what you say friends.
Oh, and welcome back!
Thanks. I thoroughly appreciate the irony of your warning against electronic monitoring - coming from a man who has dubbed himself "big bro" . . .
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